It is not always easy to co-parent after a divorce or a separation. Although, co-parenting is sometimes the best way to ensure you meet all of your children’s needs while also allowing them to maintain close relationships with both parents.
The quality of co-parenting relationships can also significantly impact children’s mental and emotional well-being, which is why co-parents should strive to make it a pleasant one. Making decisions together, dealing with one another, or speaking to someone you would rather forget about can seem like a daunting task.
However, you can overcome co-parenting difficulties and build an amicable relationship with your ex-spouse or partner for the sake of your children’s interests. Follow our guidelines below.
Do Not Involve Your Child in Fights
Although you could never totally let go of bitterness and resentment over your separation, you can keep those feelings grounded and remind yourself that they are yours, not your child’s. Never use your children as a message. Your kids are at the core of your dispute when you use them to send messages to your co-parent.
Never make your children feel obligated to pick between you and your ex-partner by saying terrible things about the other. Remember that your child has a right to communicate with both parents freely.
Get Rid of Anger and Hurt
Your own emotions must not meddle with your children’s needs for you to co-parent successfully. Letting go of such intense feelings is indeed the most challenging part of learning to work together with your ex, but it is also the most important.
Child custody and co-parenting are about your child’s happiness and future, not your own or your former spouse’s.
Separate Your Behaviors and Feelings
Your feelings are valid, yes, but they do not always have to govern your actions. Instead, let your actions be driven by what is best for your children, which is working together with the other parent.
Your interactions with your ex should be centered around your child. Remember why you need to move with grace when resentful: your child’s best interests are at risk if you carelessly lash out over frustration at your ex.
Set Aside Your Past
Separating your relationship with your ex from your co-parenting relationship is the key to successful co-parenting. It may be beneficial to consider your relationship with your ex as a whole new one, solely concerned with your child’s well-being alone.
While your marriage is over, don’t forget that you still have a family. You must first prioritize your child’s needs before your own to be a responsible co-parent.
Work on Communicating
Even if it seems unattainable, having a peaceful, consistent relationship with your ex is crucial to co-parenting success. Consider how your actions may affect your child before speaking with your ex and committing to communicate with each other with respect.
We recommend finding out which form of contact works best for both of you, as the goal is to build conflict-free communication.
Lastly, you and your ex must make major decisions concerning your child together. It is critical that you remain open, honest, and upfront about vital matters.
If you need a family lawyer, rely on Dreyer and Associates Family Lawyers. We are dedicated to preserving the best interests of families in Langley. Call us today!